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Billionaires Anonymous

Hi, Iím Tracy. Itís not my real name; whatís real about a name anyway? You donít have to know who I am. If I donít know, you canít know.
I donít want you to think Iím not a nice person. Iím here at Billionaires Anonymous because I did all the right things in the land of opportunity and was rewarded for all my clever moves. Iím flattered to be featured here as the premiere guest speaker of the week but I don't think Iíll be able to reach anymore than a few billionaires whoíve done what I did. They ...

Government Work

I know all of you are proud to have passed our generic test for government work. I also am aware you feel totally unqualified as I do for any of the diverse and almost bizarrely various jobs youíve applied for.
Let me tell you as a veteran: mo matter what you do or donít do incompetently youíll be right at home working for us. Iím not ever competent myself at this speech as you can probably tell; In fact I think my fly is open. Excuse me. It isnít open. I wonder why I thought it was. You may ...

The Suburban Hunt

Hi, Iím Jezreel, but you might want to call me Lamont. Thatís obviously not the moniker I was born with; whatís the difference? Do we really want to bumble through life living by all the mistakes of our parents? We do, of course; we donít like it. Even they donít like it.
Hey, Iím flattered to the be the featured speaker at Suburbanites Anonymous though frankly I donít think things are ever anonymous enough here. If I could Iíd be invisible like God. Iíd like to show up in a mask, even talk to you in a fake voice behind ...

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